Saturday, February 7, 2009

I Loves Winter, But I Hates Snow

I love the winter season. I love the way it coats the mountain in a soft blanket of white snow, tucking it in for the night and giving the mountain a warm glow.

What? A warm glow? Pfft. The warm glow comes from the campfires that stupid people light to keep warm because they were stupid enough to hike up the mountain in a snowstorm. Frostbite here we come!

I can stand out in my front or side yard during the evening and just revel in its quiet beauty and silent strength.

Right. Quiet beauty and inner strength. Oh yeah, the quiet beauty of seeing your car buried in a foot of snow at the bottom of the driveway, and the inner strength that you'll need because the snow blower died and you got nothing but a shovel to dig yourself out with.

I look up and down the street and it takes me back to my childhood when the only thing I had to worry about was how large I wanted to make the snowman.

Sure, worry about the snowman and not worry about getting buried by a blow when it throws a three foot high snowbank at ya, which buries your sorry butt up to your neck.

I can hike up the mountain and go sledding down the side trails for hours on end.

Yay, sledding!! Whoops, look at that guy take air! OMG, face first into the pine tree!

I can go for short walks around the neighborhood, and know that I'll find peace of mind while doing it.

Don't forget the cars that are stuck in the snow drifts off to the side! Man those people will have a long walk home, simply because the roads ain't plowed!

Hmmmm.....I can drive without worrying about where the road is and...

That's because there is no road! Do you think that the town/city/state has the smarts to plow the roads properly? Of course they don't! They would rather have stupid drivers like yourself travel down the road and plow for them!

But I can....

But nothing smart guy! Snow sucks! Unplowed roads suck! No power sucks! Frozen pipes suck! Get with the program, snow sucks! Sucks! Sucks! Sucks! Understand?

Not in the eyes of a child. In the eyes of a child, the snow is a wonderland of magic, of a fresh new beginning. To make snow angels. To make snowmen. To build forts and have snowball fights. To experience life uncorrupted by the world around them.

In short, snow is the best free thing a child can have and that a parent can give to a child. Understand?

The inner voice jumps down from the shoulder and stomps away in a huff. Opening the door, he takes one step outside and immediately falls into a deep pile of snow, and isn't found until the spring.

18 comments:

  1. LOL, isn't that the truth? When you start having to shovel it (and it's not a "fun thing" you do as a child), things totally change.

    Great post, Georgie!

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  2. Thanks.

    Wrote this after experiencing one too many snow storms in the past few weeks and reading in a few of the southern oriented blogs that experienced snow for the first time in ages.

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  3. There's lots of truth to both sides of this story, very funny. As a native New Englander, I had a good Saturday laugh. Thanks! Here's wishing you not too much more snow.

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  4. You're more than welcome for the Saturday chuckle.

    Here's hoping that you don't get too much snow either.

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  5. I have yet to see snow.

    Must make a special trip one of these winters :)

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  6. I grew up in New York and by the time I left was sick of the weather. My wife and I went home for the holidays and I had convinced myself I wanted to experience a white Christmas again. We went shopping and on an icy road we had an accident, sliding into a cadillac. I hate the snow!

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  7. David: sorry to hear that you had an accident.

    For the past month here, the plowing has been distincly uneven. I've gone from relatively decent plowed roads where I live to non-plowed roads the minute I cross the city line.

    Personally, I would love to experience a brown Christmas in Connecticut. Sure would make it easy on the commute.

    Mad Cat: Not seen snow? In some aspects, you ain't missing much, but in others it is something special to experience.

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  8. I think we all liked snow as a kid.

    Hours of fun using your imagination and what not.

    As adults, it's a whole different enchilada.

    Unless you ski, snowmobile or snowboard.

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  9. Hi George,

    I didn't want to ask this on the forums. At your work have you ever run into a Barbara Walsh or a Debbie Walsh/Downes?

    The former was data entry clerk and the latter a lab aide.

    TRUTH

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  10. I'll ignore all the italicized parts and revel in the inner peace, beauty and happiness scenes, which were beautifully described, thanks.

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  11. Why thank you, young lady.

    Describing any kind of scene is usually one of my strong points while writing.

    Doing it on my blog helps me reign in my tendency to overwrite.

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  12. They both worked for the state. B. Walsh worked as a data entry clerk for 25 years. She got her daughter Debbie a job there some years ago, and I was just wondering if you had ever met them. Barbara was really nice but her daughter was shady. I haven't see them in about 10 years. Just wondering what ever happened to them.

    Oh, they worked for the dept. of Laboratories on Clinton street, I think.

    TRUTH

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  13. Yep, I know just what you mean. Over a week of snow here and my boys are still in awe. I'm sick of it and today - trying to forcing some normality and turn up to sports practice - I got stuck in the snow in the car park. Again, the boys thought it was simply awesome.

    I have to admit it though, after a while I quite enjoyed all the revving and cursing.

    And finally I get to say I've driven like James Bond! (Although somewhat slower.)

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  14. The only thing that I've found that snow is good for (as an adult) would be that I can practice my hazardous driving skills.

    Beyond that, I've developed a low tolerance for snow now.

    On the bright side, the temps have been warming up since I wrote this post, so most of the snow has melted away.

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  15. That was a much needed laugh after all this snow. Thanks!

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  16. You're more than welcome.

    I'm gonna think of something for springtime that will be in the same vein as well.

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