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Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Whimsy, Thy Name Is Holly

snoooooooooooooooooore

jingle, jingle, jingle

jump

"What the...whose there?! Holly?!"


meow.

"Holly! It's five o'clock in the morning! Breakfast isn't for another half hour!!"


meow.

"I don't care! Get off my chest!"



The cat goes airborne, bounces off the door and executes a perfect four paw landing. Sitting down, she wraps her tail around her hear and begin to purr rather loudly. This goes on for several minutes before she abruptly stops and climbs up onto the bed. Very quickly, she climb up on her "master's" chest, sit down mere inches from his face and purrs.


Loudly.

A few minutes later, the man groggily opens his eyes and rubs them for several seconds, before going into shock as his cat is purring directly into his mouth.

Startled, he sits up and tosses the cat through the open door and out of the room, where she graciously executes another perfect four paw landing.

"And stop bothering me for breakfast! I'll feed you when I'm damn good and ready, ya dumb cat!"

The man staggers out of bed and as he walks from dresser to dresser gathering up his implements of destruction (coffee cup, meds, tray), Holly is right there, walking in between his legs and generally staying underfoot. More than once the man steps on Holly, who yelps in pain and scoots out of the room and down the stairs.

The man continues to stagger and lurch as he walks down the stairs, all the while trying to dodge Holly, who's determined to trip him. Sure enough, a couple of minutes later, at the exact moment the man steps onto the landing, he tangles with Holly and goes airborne.

Landing with a thud, it was many minutes later before he came to. When he did, the first thing that he saw was Holly sitting on his chest and purring like a motorboat.



The man raises his head and says, "I can't feed you if you're siting on my chest!"

Holly jumps off, runs over to the windowsill and jumps on. Poking her head out from between the curtains, she let rips with a guttural growl that causes the man to flinch.

"Shut up!" says the man as he throws his coffee cup at Holly.

Holly dodges the cup and jumps down as the man walks over to grab her food dish. As he's walking back to the kitchen, Holly starts walking in between and once again the man lands on his back with a thud.

Holly quickly jumps on the man and proceeds to sit on his face.



The man struggles to break free, but the more he struggles the more Holly shifts her position to fully cover his face.

The man starts to turn a bright shade of red but Holy has no intention of moving until she is fed. The man struggles in vain to get free but Holly proves to be too much for him as he abruptly slips in the big sleep. As the man twitches one final time, Holly jumps straight up into the air and lands squarely on the man's stomach.



Yawning, she flashes a mouthful of razor sharp teeth. Lick her lips, she let rips with another guttural growl, before settling down to eat breakfast.

10 comments:

  1. A female that knows what she wants and how to get it.

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  2. See what happens when we don't respond immediately to a cat's demand for breakfast? Serves him right. She'll eat his eyeballs first, they're easiest.

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  3. Charles: Absolutely. I go through this every day. :D

    Debra: Yummy. :D

    Lynn: Thanks.

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  4. Vasil chews on our hair trying to get us to wake up before it's time. But are you kidding? Once we do, they have to EAT before we do ANYTHING.

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  5. M: I have no hair so I'm pretty safe in that aspect. What Holly actually does is sit by my face and purr very loudly when its time for breakfast.

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  6. There is always a punishment for not doing what the feline requests... always!
    Mischief has been so bad this week- But not that bad yet! you are not alone (she's watching!)

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  7. Snaggle: Glad to hear it. Yes, sadly, we have to do what the feline requests. :D

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  8. I can't help feeling glad she won. :D

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G. B. Miller

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