Friday, August 31, 2012


Due to seriously irritating factors way beyond my control, or maybe within my control, I don't know at this point, today's regularly scheduled multi-blog post is postponed until next week.

Instead, I leave you with this nugget from 2000.

In an attempt to help women better understand the men that they are with:

1} I'm going fishing

Translated: I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid, and sit in a boat with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety.

2} It's a guy thing

Translated: There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical.

3} Can I help with dinner?

Translated: Why isn't it already on the table?

4} Uh-huh, sure honey or alternately yes dear

Translated: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditional response.

5} It would take too long to explain

Translated: I have no idea how it works.

6} I was listening to you. It's just that I have things on my mind

Translated: I was wondering if that red head over there is wearing a bra.

7} Take a break honey, you're working too hard

Translated: I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner.

8} That's interesting dear

Translated: Are you still talking?

9} You know how bad my memory is

Translated: I remember the theme song to F Troop, the address of the first girl I ever kissed, and the vehicle identification numbers of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday.

10} I was just thinking about you, and got you these roses

Translated: The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe.

11} Oh, don't fuss. I just cut myself, it's no big deal

Translated: I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit that I'm hurt.

12} Hey, I got my reasons for what I'm doing

Translated: And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon.


  1. LOL you shouldn't share such things, can't give away all our secrets.

  2. Excellent! Hope the annoyance goes away soon.

  3. Pat: But it helps in avoiding unnecessary grief and aggravation. Still, we do have some goodies stashed away, don't we?

    R: It should eventually. I think that this weekend will definitely help acheive that goal.

  4. Ha! :) My husband can actually get away with #9 -- he really DOES have a horrible memory. But fortunately, he's always managed to remember my birthday... :)

  5. Lisa: And that is the most important thing in a relationship, the guy remembering the gal's b'day. :D

  6. I've dropped some of these over time. Kept a couple.

  7. David: #3, 4 and 7 I usually get in trouble with if I actually verbalize.

  8. You forgot #13...
    "I understand"
    Translation" I have no idea what was said, what was meant, why I am in trouble or how to get out of it, so if I claim understanding (with optional apology) maybe this will end and I can get back to watching the game.

  9. This was so accurate! N amusing too-
    Thanks for the laugh!

  10. And now the truth is out. (Aren't you breaking some guy code?)

  11. Darth: Brilliant!

    Although with my wife, should I whip out that statement, I usually bury myself into a deeper hole than I'm already in.

    Snaggle: You're more than welcome.

    G.A.: Perhaps. :D

  12. Charles: don't worry, i didn't share all of them.

  13. Oops I thought I was the only one who said "Can I help with dinner" when I'm starving! :D

  14. Joe: Welcome back. Hope you're doing well.

    I say that kind of thing all the time as well. :D


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